Saturday, August 06, 2005

We returned Thursday evening to find that our Russian Desert Tortoise, Max, was MIA. Our housesitter was distraught. He had wandered the neighborhood with LOST TURTLE signs and had scoured the backyard with our dog in tow, searching every square inch, hoping the dog would catch her scent and lead us to her (max, we found out after 5 years of being known as "him", was actually a "her"). I would often let Max roam the yard while I sat in the swing, reading a book. She really loved her outings. Our housesitter did the same, and even created an elaborate bright pink flag that he attached to her with rubber bands so that he could see her wherever she would roam. Both the turtle and the flag were missing.

I was surprised how bummed out I was by this news. We've had Max for almost 8 years in which time she's more than tripled in size. She sleeps a lot (3 months at a time to be exact). She's easy to care for. She isn't demanding. I expected to find the dead houseplants, maybe dead tomatoe plants, I worried about the dogs, I even worried a bit about the parakeets -- but the turtle? Never once did I worry about the turtle.

A friend of mine at work has a tortoise that has been with her for over 40 years now. He actually opens the sliding door to go outside to do his business. He's been doing this for about 25 years ever since he became too big to fit through the doggie door. After consulting with the local pet store ("don't worry, mrs. johnson, we'll call you if we hear anything") I contacted my friend. "Tortoises are good hiders," she assured me, "I can't tell you how many times I checked the gate, thinking he got out. He would always show up eventually." Although I felt a little better, I still had to find our Max. She was only 8 after all, and with a life expectancy of 100 years or more, she was just a baby.

Over a month ago we bought a red-eared slider to live in our pond. (It's a Home Depot backyard pond that sits in ground and is surrounded by rocks and landscape. it has a waterfall and a couple of fountains. It is filled with water plants and goldfish that have grown so big they nearly resemble coi.) We figured he'd be the first of several water turtles if it worked out. We were told he'd eat everything in the pond, and we hoped he could keep the pond plants under control. We figured the fish were big enough that he wouldn't eat them. Anyway, he managed to disappear over night. We still haven't figured out that mystery. We considered the birds of prey abundant in our neighborhood. We wondered about the dogs, but figured there would at least be some remains. We even looked hard at our huge goldfish and wondered for a minute if they could be the culprits. We figured he made a home near the pond in the shelter of the morning glory vines that seem to own that part of our property, and procrastinated about hacking our way through to the fenceline and pulling them down. That turtle was only with us for 10 hours, so we weren't heartbroken. Just curious. Now with the news of our beloved tortoise gone missing, the morning glories had to go.

So today, our mission was to remove at least half of the morning glories, especially the ones that were overgrowing the pond area. It was operation "find Max". We filled 6 big bags with pieces of the vine. We found a dead bird in its snare and worried that the turtle would be next - but no sign of her (or the slider). We found armies of ants, colonies of spiders (one wolf spider that looks like he'd made a good watch dog), countless "rollie-pollies", but no evidence of a tortoise.

In the end, I sat on the rocks at the edge of the pond and noticed how lush the water lettuce had become. The water lily leaves had to compete for some surface space, and I couldn't see the fish so well (there are at least 15). I brushed the plants aside, expecting to see the fish darting away, and that is where I found Max. She was in the corner of the pond, her lifeless eyes looking up toward the shaft of light that came down through the water plants. The pink flag and rubberbands were lying near her on the bottom. She must have climbed on the rocks and fallen in. She sunk silently like a rock to the bottom where she managed to walk toward the light. She may have even scratched at the wall to get out. She died there, looking up. I couldn't bear to pull her out. My husband got her and sat her on the rocks, where for a moment she looked as if she would be fine.

I was inconsolable. The depth of my grief still shocks me. I had no idea how attached I was to her. Even my kids are not as sad as I am. Perhaps it was my expectation that she would outlive me. Perhaps it was because we had failed to protect her from the dangers of the big world. Whatever the reason, I cried like a baby. We put her in a giant tupperware container and buried her where the morning glories used to be.

The slider is still missing. I am pretty sure he couldn't live this long out of the water. The irony doesn't escape me -- that the land turtle would perish in the home meant for the water turtle -- seems like an O Henry story. My husband cleaned out the pond (again) and searched everywhere for him, hoping that if Max could have been there for 2 days and not seen (even though we were looking everywhere) perhaps the slider is still alive in there. No luck to date. Maybe tomorrow.

++Thank you Lord, for the short life of Max the tortoise. 8 years was really not even a fraction of the time she was meant to have, but it was long enough for her to become a part of our history. She was a glorious creature, a marvelous creation, and I loved her. I don't think I ever would have wanted such a pet -- I'm glad you worked out those details. Like all people who have loved and lost, I am greatful for the time I had. I feel silly to be so sad over this, but sad is what I am. I give you my mournful heart Lord and ask that you would comfort me.

10 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Kim,
I am so sorry to hear about Max. Its amazing how God's creatures touch are lives in so many ways. Our pets become so much apart of the family. They totally rely on us to be their caregivers. They love us unconditionally. They bring us joy & laughter & ask so little in return. They truly are the perfect "best friend".

12:01 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well Kim, thanks for posting a comment on my Brookville blog. I answered that post there. Then I came to your blog out of curiousity, more than anything, thinking you might be the Kim that I know who works for the city. But I don't think so. Anyway, I read your tale about Max and the water turtle. I learned something I didn't even know -- that land turtles drown in water? I simply never thought about it and for that reason, alone, the read was a good one. I know how you all feel about losing Max. It is a shame that it had to happen. My lifetime friend used to have one in his house. It got to be a large tortoise and I think it just flat out died one day and they were heartbroken. It was a good story to read and your wrote it very well. I have a new blog you haven 't read at http://abelincoln.modblog.com that I am starting and invite you to take a look at it. Your Max story would fit in there.

2:39 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry! Losing a pet is so hard - no reason to feel silly. May God bring you comfort in the days and weeks to come.

10:08 AM  
Blogger Preston said...

Sorry about Max. You told his story beautifully, though.

4:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So sorry about Max. I am a total pet lover and completely understand how attached we become to our pets. I have two cats and I feel like they are my children. I will be praying for the Lord to heal your heart, as well as comfort you.

9:01 PM  
Blogger JoMo said...

Dear Kim,

So sorry about Max! Our college here has a tortoise named Emmanuelle who wanders around the quad for about half of the year and hibernates in a student's closet for the rest of the year. Once I was holding a "tutorial" (one-on-one teaching session) outside on the grass in the lovely spring weather, and Emmanuelle seemed very interested in our conversation, and sidled over to join us. She has won (at some time in the past) the university's intercollegiate tortoise race, which somehow made the national TV news broadcast at the time! I think only 2 or 3 other Oxford colleges keep tortoises, so it's not a widely entered competition, although it still does occur most years.

For awhile, we had two tortoises roaming the quad--I think the other belonged to a student who brought his tortoise to college to keep Emmanuelle company. Since the new tortoise was a male, his ideas about "keeping company" in the middle of a game of croquet caused an occasional bit of blushing....

4:05 AM  
Blogger Rick said...

very well written, very moving part of your life there. thanks for sharing with the rest of us.

4:06 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh Kim...I'm so glad I didn't read this while you were here. You, Me and the bottle of wine would have been crying for quite a while. Bye Max....

5:00 AM  
Blogger Kim said...

KAZ!! so happy to see you here :). Wish I was back in your living room :(. Love and hugs to you and Logan.

8:37 AM  
Blogger Refreshment in Refuge said...

Kim, I know how you feel. Our dog Libby had a stroke and we found her covered in leaves when we got back into town. I had no idea how attached I was to her until I saw that silky black fur under all those leaves.

It is amazing how people and pets wiggle into our hearts without us realizing it. We had better pay closer attention.

8:38 AM  

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